Or should I call it the summer of
Moet Et Chandon? It is hard to tell which brand I indulged myself with more this
summer. And I know you must be wondering why I am still talking about summer
when it is almost Christmas. The answer is both simple and complicated. Simple
because I started writing this at the end of the summer – yes, I know I only
wrote two sentences then, and complicated because I was writing it when I
thought it was the end of an era – and yes, it now is.
It is the end of the free
champagne era for me, for now at least. Champagne was in fact the highlight of
my 2012. I attended so many openings, met so many people, interviewed some, had
a crush on others, and hated the rest. The job was worthless money wise, experience
wise even, but it offered so many perks on the social front.
I am not sure anymore what I
wanted to say when I started writing this, but I am pretty certain I wanted to
vent on something or the other. I am an innate nagger, as you must have already
noticed by now. I can’t really find it in me to pester tonight though, shocking
I know!
Well anyway, long story short, I
have started a new job, a more challenging one on all levels so far. It is time
to get serious, time to get busy and time to try and leave behind my semi
bohemian life. Somehow it feels good to have so much to do. It is startling how
much I didn’t know and how big is the stack of things I have never experienced
before. Bye bye champagne and aloha social misery. So long two hours work days
and 4 days off a week, and hello 24/7 marathon. That makes it sound a bit
frustrating, but what isn’t? I have always been an extremist in any case, why
change now?
I am excited. I am anxious. I am
worried. I am already tired. But I want to make a plan. I want to stick to it
too for once. I am even considering trying out a diet again. Useless I know;
hopeless maybe. But I have to confess it has crossed my mind. I want to benefit
from the situation, turn it around to fit me in all ways, as much as I can. I
want to buy a car. I want to travel. I want to be independent. I want to live.
I want to live. I do. I may not
have much time for it with the crazy schedule, but I promise to try. I hereby
promise that should the plan work, I am going to live. I am going to have
champagne with my friends for a change. I want to enjoy it. I want to pop it
and smear it all over the place. I want to get into pillow fights with my
girls. I want to leave the crust behind and feel fresh and energetic. Most of
all, I want to get away from the coffee shop, to step away from my routine, to
shake myself to do more, to feel more, to be more.
It felt like a cinematic moment
when I left the old office for the last time. I felt pretty wearing that smile
around and offering it to strangers. The wind blowing through my hair and my
scarf gave me a shiver, not one of cold though, but one of pride. Been a while
since I felt happy, or proud, let alone both together.
As always, I shall treasure the
friends I made along the way and cherish the memories, the experience and the
mistakes. All of it will just fill me with more of something I already hold
plenty of: nostalgia. Days that will never repeat themselves no matter how hard
we try, moments that we might never be able to grasp again no matter how badly
we want to, and people who leave such a mark in us that it becomes impossible
not to attempt to find it in the rest of the human race. So here is to a summer
that despite its trouble will remain, like all the ones that preceded it, and
all the ones that will hopefully follow it, a memorable one. Rain is washing it
out tonight, trying to steal its stickiness from my mind, and the winter lover
in me feels like leaving my chair and walking under it, feels like getting wet,
like embracing the most beautiful season of all, the most powerful of all, the
most empowering of all. May those heavenly clouds accompany me and protect me
in my new endeavor; may they guide my path towards the new era, the latest
opportunity and the divine blessing.
